VVF Ladies Return!

The VVF ladies have returned and its making my heart smile! I love these ladies like nothing else. We had a screening day last week and saw over 30 ladies, some were ladies that we had sent home still leaking from earlier on in the outreach but many of them were new arrivals. It was bittersweet to see some of them return.

We have the space to perform 20 operations over two weeks, and Im sure its going to be an emotional roller coaster of highs and lows. Highs when they are able to go home dry and we can sing and dance for joy with them and lows when they leave here still leaking.

One patient I looked after when she was here earlier on in the outreach has returned, her name is Agath and she is only 21, she has lived with this fistula for nearly 6 years. She was 16 when she became pregnant to her then husband (he has since desserted her) leaving her alone and feeling rejected. She left here last time still leaking and has returned for us to have another attempt at repairing the hole in her bladder. I was so excited to see her again when she turned up at the screening, I walked into the ward and I heard this voice full of excitement say 'Beccy!' I ran over to her and gave her the biggest hug and told her that I was so happy to see her again and said that this time I pray that we will send you home dry. Sadly since her operation she has been leaking. It breaks my heart that we may end up sending her home again still leaking. She is only 21 and still has her whole life ahead of her. We have told her we will not give up but I know that she is heart broken too. For those of you who are praying please pray that Agath goes home dry this time.

The World Health Organization has estimated that approximately 2 million women worldwide have untreated VVF and that approximately 100,000 women develop VVF each year. What we do here on the ship is literally just a drop in an ocean so huge its almost incomprehensible but we are making big difference to those we are able to help and for that Im grateful.

Seasons

I know that there is a season for everything under the sun and that all seasons must come to an end but lately I have been feeling that Im not quite ready for this season of my life to come to an end. How to deal with that has been a little struggle for me over the last week or two. The ship is due to leave Benin on the 8th of December and yes that is still a little while away but its getting closer and closer and I dont I like it. Its strange to think about how worried I was about coming here and yet now that I am here, Im not wanting it to end and Im not wanting to leave.


Being here has been a life changing experience for me and I know I have changed alot since I have been here, even in just the way I see and feel about things. I've learned to be grateful for some of the smaller things in life, things like some of the conversations I have with people, the friendships I've made, the people I have met, lived and worked with for the last four and a half months. Some of the friendships I have made I know will be lifelong friendships but some of these people who I have met and worked with especially my friends that I have made here in Benin I'm not sure if I will ever see them again, well on this earth anyway. That can be a little hard to comprehend at times. But in saying all that I am forever grateful that I have been allowed to have this experience and know that all good things must come to an end.

Out and about in Cotonou

What to do in Cotonou on a day off? There is certainly plenty to choose from. Be it going to one of the smaller local markets or the Dantokpa market which is one of the biggest markets in West Africa, swimming in one of the local hotel swimming pool, getting to go out with one of my translator friends or exploring this hectic city that the ship is docked in.

Going to Dantokpa market is quite the cultural experience and not really for the faint hearted. You can buy anything and everything you could possibly ever imagine needing, from cosmetics to underwear and clothing to fruit and vegetables to live goats and chickens to electronic goods like irons and blenders to any medication you could possibly imagine needing all without prescription! The sheer madness and crazyness of the market is hard to describe unless its something you experience yourself, there are thousands of people to contend with and they are all shouting out at you ''yovo yovo! I give you good price!'' The heat and the intense smells that seem to permeate the air within the market is something that is hard to put into words.

The city itself is hectic and busy like any city you might come across, it can be quite the challenge to just cross the road. Dodging a gazillion motorbikes and cars coming at you and no-one obeying road rules (Im not sure if they even know what they are) The trick is to find a local thats crossing the road at the same time and go with them, they seem to have had lots of practice at this!

Getting to go out with one of my translator friends is also a treat, not being able to speak the local language but having a translator on hand makes it so much easier to communicate with people you come across. I truely apprecitate it when I am given a small but often brief glimpse into the realities of life and living here and getting to go out and off ship with them certainly gives me that.

Living on a ship

Sometimes the fact that I live on a ship drives me a little crazy. Dont get me wrong I very much appreciate all the western creature comforts the ship provides like running hot water, flushing toilets, electricity and a starbucks cafe but the fact that I dont live in the 'real' africa sometimes gets to me. But then I wonder to myself could I really survive living out there? I'm sure if I really had to I would be able to but in all reality would I want to? Im not to sure what the answer to that is just yet.

So I live on the 3rd deck and there are 8 decks in total. We have gurkhas that man our gangway, the picture above is of me with Ganesh one of our four friendly gurkhas. The hospital is also on the 3rd deck so its just a short stroll down the corridor and Im at work for the day, no worries about traffic jams or having to get up early to travel to work! There are no windows on the 3rd deck so it must be quite strange for our patients having no natural light sometimes for up to 2 weeks! But if we can we usually take them up to deck 7 every afternoon to give them some fresh air and let them see some real daylight.

One of things I love about the ship is living in a community with 400 or so other people and all being here for the same purpose but then in saying that, it can also be one of the worse things too. Just for the reason that you can never really get away from anyone, there is always someone else around and for a girl who likes to have her own space that can be a little hard!
Sometimes you can really feel the ship swaying and other times you can hardly feel it at all. There is always some kind of noise to be heard whether the noise of the engines or the generators running or some other noise going on.

I know that if I havent been off the ship for a few days I start to feel like I need to get out and get some of that not always so fresh African air in my lungs and some of the dust on my feet just to remind myself that yes I am here in Africa and to remind myself of why I am really here. Thats the thing about being here, I think it gets in under your skin, and I know its going to be pretty hard to leave.

Some thoughts from Africa

Well I am the first to admit that I have been pretty slack at keeping everyone updated while I have been here. I wonder to myself why that is and think its maybe to do with the fact that I just dont know where to start. How do I begin to describe what I am seeing and experiencing when I find it hard to put into words myself? I know that I have changed since I have been here and I wonder how evident it will be to people when I return home.

Its hard to believe that I have been here nearly 3 months already and Im nearly halfway through. Time is flying by and I feel I still have so much I want and need to do. I have met some truely amazing people while I have been here and have made many friendships that I know will last a lifetime.

I have also seen things that have literally broken my heart. On the 31st of July we had a beautiful baby arrive on the ship to become part of our feeding program. He was 9 months old and weighed only 3kg. He had had his cleft lip repaired in April but was awating to have his palate repaired at some stage in November but before we could repair that for him he needed some fattening up. He was doing really well for about 3 weeks, gaining weight and starting to look fat and beautiful when he developed pneumonia and malaria and some other viral illness we were unable to diagnose due to our lack of resources. He ended up in the ICU with a tube to help him breath and a million other tubes coming out of his little body while he was struggling to survive. Finally on a Monday morning at around 10am his Papa said enough suffering, stop all the treatment. Everything was turned off and his Papa held him tight while he passed away in his arms. He was given his last bath put in clean clothes and his Mama put him onto her back and they walked down the gangway with their dead baby. It has to be one of the saddest things I have ever seen. The way his Mama gently put her dead baby on her back is something I will never ever forget.


Despite all the heartache and hardships and ups and downs I have had since being here I am totally content. I am content with the fact that I live in a dark cabin that has no natural light, I live with 5 other females and I sleep on a narrow bunk bed.

I really couldnt imagine being anywhere else right now.

Life in the wards

Life in the wards here is totally different to my life in the ward I was working in back home. After working in a busy acute surgical ward this is a breeze! On a typical shift here we start by praying for our patients and the for the shift ahead of us, after that we recieve hand over of our patients and start our tasks for the day. Quite often this includes health education and teaching our patients about what to expect before and after surgery, monitoring them after surgery, giving out medications, playing games with them and generally spending time chatting with them. Although this can be very hard due to the language barrier! So generally we have to use our translators to be able to actually communicate with them which I found hugely frustrating at first but now find it strange if I actually have a patient that can speak english!!

I very rarely give anything IV (intravenous) other than fluids, I havent done many complex dressings or had many 'really sick' patients. I take a lot of vital signs and hand out an awful lot of pain medications, sometimes I dont even feel like I am a 'real nurse' here but I must admit I still love it and I know its where I am meant to be for now.

Trip to Calavi University

Hello again

On Wednesday this last week one of my translator friends Daniel invited me and two of my friends Maggie and Bonnie from the ship to go and visit him at the university that he attends here in Cotonou and I would have to say it was one of the best trips off the ship that I have had here so far. It was a really great insight into real life for someone that lives here. He took us on a tour around the university which is similar in many ways to any university anywhere in the world but then so different at the same time. He showed us around and inside some of the lecture halls and thru the library, plus inside the student radio station. What we saw was only a fraction of the campus as it is actually really big. Parts of it were well kept grounds but then other areas were just covered with litter everywhere, it made me sad to think that such well educated people would think nothing of just dropping their rubbish on the ground and I said so to my friend Maggie and she said but if thats all they have ever known then why would they change? I guess it makes sense but it bothered me and it still does.

After touring around the campus and meeting various friends of Daniels along the way plus a proposal from one of them I might add! Daniel took us to meet one of his best friends who lives in some of the student accomodation just off the campus. We walked around with him and one of his friends and sister for a little while before heading to Daniel's house. His house was simple but clean and tidy (he admitted later that he had spring cleaned for us!) It consisted of just two rooms, a front room with a dining table in it and then his bedroom, it also had a small out house type room out the back but no running water, or toilet. I wanted to ask about that but decided it wasnt such a good idea. We sat and chatted with him and his friends who spoke ''small small english'' for a while then Daniel decided we should go and have dinner before we returned to the ship. He took us to a small open restaurant on the campus and we ate a meal of Alche ke which consisted of something similar to cous cous with a spicy sauce and then fish (for those of you who know me well you would know I hate fish so you can imagine I wasnt overly happy about his choice of food for us!) But I graciously tried it and for the most part it was pretty good I have to say!

After dinner he ushered us into a taxi and waved us off to the ship. It was one of the coolest days I have had here and his hospitality was awesome, so thank you Daniel for a lovely day!