Quick facts about Togo

Togo is ranked as one of the poorest nations in the world, its ranked by the human development index at 159 out of 182. Access to health care is inadequate, the under five mortality rate is 140 out of 1000 babies born. Life expectancy is only 58.

Capital
Lome
Area
56,785km2
Population
5,285,501
Language
French, Ewe, Mina, Kabye, Dagomba (plus many more)
Currency
CFA
Government
Currently in the election process
Religion
Indigenous beliefs 51%, Christian 29%, Muslim 20%.

If you read my last post you'll know I cant wait to get there. I leave home in a week today!

I cant wait

I leave in two weeks today. With much less apprehension in my heart and far more peace than the last time I was heading off to Africa and off to the unknown. Because this time I know this is where I am meant to be, not that I didnt know that last time but there was all the 'unknown' that went along with leaving.

You wouldnt believe how excited I am to be going back. I just cant wait. I cant wait to feel the heat of the african sun beating down on my face, to get some of that african dirt on my feet and breathe in that not so fresh african air, to feel the sweat dripping down my back, (well maybe I can wait for that). I cant wait to see those african Mama's walking along the street with their babes strapped tightly to their backs with brightly coloured strips of fabric carrying all sorts of wares for sale upon their heads, to feel the weight of one of those babes in my arms, to step out into the chaos of an african city and soak up all the sights, sounds and smells that my poor senses can take in and that I know I will be assulted with once I step off that plane and back onto african soil.
Oh I cant wait.
I cant wait to see what is in store for this new outreach, the new patients that are going to step onto that big white ship and walk back out with not only physical healing but also emotional and spirtual healing. The ship is docked in Lome Togo this year and Im sure the need there is just as great as it was last year in Benin.

I fly out on the 4th of March and head to London where I get to meet up with my awesome friend Maggie who I met on the ship last year and who is also returning to the ship. We have a night in London and then we fly on down to Togo together.
Oh I just cant wait.

On a sidenote I am having another coffee and dessert fundraising evening on the 27th of February at my church 51 Lane Street Upper Hutt 7pm onwards, $15 for singles $25 for couples, I would love it for you to come and hear all about what I have been up to over the last 7 months and see more of what I will be up to once I get back.

Home...

So I'm back home. I'm excited to be back but I must say it feels a little strange, almost like I never left, but I know I did leave and that I changed alot during my time away.

So the things I missed the most other than my family and friends?
Having the freedom to just hop in my car and go for a drive
Fresh cold milk
Poached eggs on toast
New Zealand chocolate
My queen sized bed
Hanging my washing outside on the line to dry
Showers longer than 2 minutes!
Waking up to natural light in my bedroom

So while I missed all these things while I was away and I am enjoying having them back while I am home I learned to live quite happily without them while I was on the ship. I think the biggest lesson I learned while away was to be content whatever the circumstances. I was content living in a dark cabin with no windows, sleeping on a narrow bunk bed and sharing my living quaters with 5 other females. I was content while I was there and have never had such a peace about something like I felt while I was there. I knew it was where I was meant to be which makes it a little hard being back home.
But... For those of you who dont know, I'm heading back. Back to where I felt utter contentment and where my heart was filled with so much peace and joy. And I'm excited about that.

Sailing Day

Today is the day we sail. After spending the last week and a half double bleaching everything in sight in the hospital and packing and tying everything down we are ready to go.

Walking along the hospital corridors feels a little strange now, no patients around, no singing or dancing or children running along the corridors or any general noise, just silence. Its a surreal feeling seeing everything packed up and not having patients there.

My job during the sail is to scan all of the patients notes, all 10 months worth. Thankfully Im not doing this alone and alot of them have already been scanned. Once they have all been scanned onto the computer they are then incinerated. I think it may become a little mundane after a while but in some respects its kind of nice having a job that I dont have to think to much about and I think it also might be kinda cool to come across patients files that I remember looking after and just be able to send up a little prayer for them.

Because we are leaving today my heart feels a little heavy, heavy for selfish reasons tho because Im leaving behind so many people that have really touched me while I have been here, friendships that I have made and so many thousands of patients that have passed thru the hospital that have left an impression on me. I feel like Im leaving a piece of myself behind in Benin.

Over 6000 operations were performed onboard over the last 10 months and Im so excited, grateful and a little proud to have been apart of that, so many lives have been transformed because of the work that has been done here.

So on we sail to Tenerife. After 10 days of sailing I will spend 2 days in Tenerife before heading back to England to spend a few weeks and christmas with family there and then heading back home to NZ on the 12th of Jan! I must say its been a long but certainly awesome 6 and a half months with lots of ups and downs but I would give anything to do it all over again.

Oh Africa, the end of the outreach

So all the surgeries for the year have finished and we have started to pack up some of the wards in preparation for the sail. We still have one ward open until the end of next week and any patients we have remaining will be sent to local hospitals until they are able to be sent home. We still have two VVF ladies in the ward both who had wounds that broke down post their surgeries but they are doing alot better now altho they will both probably have to be sent to a local hospital. My sweet friend Agath was sent home still leaking, it breaks my heart that we were unable to send her home dry this time. She has been reffered to Togo so I can only hope and pray that she becomes healed while she is there.

Im not sure how I feel about the outreach coming to an end because I have this overwhelming sense that my work here is not done. I go out off the ship and into town and have an aching in my heart that I just cant leave here. I recently came across a website that was talking about how they need Africa more than Africa needs them the following is an excerpt from it and it explains exactly how I feel about being here with the words that I was unable to find.

When I think of Africa, the following images immediately come to mind: Starvation. AIDS. Child soldiers. Genocide. Sex slaves. Orphans. From there, my thoughts naturally turn to how I can help, how I can make a difference. "I am needed here," I think. "They have so little, and I have so much." It's true, there are great tragedies playing out in Africa everyday. There is often a level of suffering here that is unimaginable until you have seen it, and even then it is difficult to believe. But what is even harder is reconciling the challenges that many Africans face with the joy I see in those same people. It's a joy that comes from somewhere I cannot fathom, not within the framework that has been my life to this day.

The images spilling out of my television showed circumstances that could seemingly only equal misery, and I was fooled. I bought into the lie that circumstance defines happiness. The truth is, in Africa I find hearts full of victory, indomitable spirits. In places where despair should thrive, instead I find adults dancing and singing, and children playing soccer with a ball crafted of tied up trash. Instead of payback, I find grace. Here, weekend getaways are not options to provide relief from the pains of daily life. Relationships and faith provide joy. Love is sovereign.

My new reality… I know now that my joy should have no regard for my circumstances. I'm ashamed by my lack of faith, but at the very same moment I am excited by my new pursuit. I'm forced to redefine the meaning of having much or having little. I'm uneasy with the prospect of change and of letting go, but just the thought of freedom is liberating. I want what I have learned to trickle down from my head into my heart - I no longer want to need the "next thing" to have joy.

I'm not saying that Africa does not need our efforts. It absolutely does need our partnership. But for me, I've come to understand that I NEED AFRICA MORE THAN AFRICA NEEDS ME. Why? Because it is Africa that has taught me that possessions in my hands will never be as valuable as peace in my heart. I've learned that I don't need what I have and that I have what I need. These are just a few of this continent's many lessons. I came here to serve and yet I've found that I have so much to learn, and Africa, with all its need, has much to teach me.

If you want to read more then you can check out

https://www.mochaclub.org/i-need-africa

VVF Ladies Return!

The VVF ladies have returned and its making my heart smile! I love these ladies like nothing else. We had a screening day last week and saw over 30 ladies, some were ladies that we had sent home still leaking from earlier on in the outreach but many of them were new arrivals. It was bittersweet to see some of them return.

We have the space to perform 20 operations over two weeks, and Im sure its going to be an emotional roller coaster of highs and lows. Highs when they are able to go home dry and we can sing and dance for joy with them and lows when they leave here still leaking.

One patient I looked after when she was here earlier on in the outreach has returned, her name is Agath and she is only 21, she has lived with this fistula for nearly 6 years. She was 16 when she became pregnant to her then husband (he has since desserted her) leaving her alone and feeling rejected. She left here last time still leaking and has returned for us to have another attempt at repairing the hole in her bladder. I was so excited to see her again when she turned up at the screening, I walked into the ward and I heard this voice full of excitement say 'Beccy!' I ran over to her and gave her the biggest hug and told her that I was so happy to see her again and said that this time I pray that we will send you home dry. Sadly since her operation she has been leaking. It breaks my heart that we may end up sending her home again still leaking. She is only 21 and still has her whole life ahead of her. We have told her we will not give up but I know that she is heart broken too. For those of you who are praying please pray that Agath goes home dry this time.

The World Health Organization has estimated that approximately 2 million women worldwide have untreated VVF and that approximately 100,000 women develop VVF each year. What we do here on the ship is literally just a drop in an ocean so huge its almost incomprehensible but we are making big difference to those we are able to help and for that Im grateful.

Seasons

I know that there is a season for everything under the sun and that all seasons must come to an end but lately I have been feeling that Im not quite ready for this season of my life to come to an end. How to deal with that has been a little struggle for me over the last week or two. The ship is due to leave Benin on the 8th of December and yes that is still a little while away but its getting closer and closer and I dont I like it. Its strange to think about how worried I was about coming here and yet now that I am here, Im not wanting it to end and Im not wanting to leave.


Being here has been a life changing experience for me and I know I have changed alot since I have been here, even in just the way I see and feel about things. I've learned to be grateful for some of the smaller things in life, things like some of the conversations I have with people, the friendships I've made, the people I have met, lived and worked with for the last four and a half months. Some of the friendships I have made I know will be lifelong friendships but some of these people who I have met and worked with especially my friends that I have made here in Benin I'm not sure if I will ever see them again, well on this earth anyway. That can be a little hard to comprehend at times. But in saying all that I am forever grateful that I have been allowed to have this experience and know that all good things must come to an end.